september

s e p t e m b e r

probably my least favorite month this year.

not because it was my last month of orientation at my new job which meant i got to see anything and everything that came through the nicu.

not because i had my first truly heart-breaking patient. as hard as it was to be with the doctor when he told them that the mri results were back for their precious little one and that there was profound global ischemic injury, i fell in love with my job that day. i got to shed tears along with the parents and the doctor. i got to support the parents as they made the biggest decision of their life. i got to explain what could be expected if they indeed chose to let their little one go. and i finally realized what everyone means when they say to me, "i don't know how you work in the nicu, that has to be so sad." and yes, it is. but so worth it.

definitely not because it was peach season!

not because my big little brother came home from his mission. santa rosa may miss elder greenwood but i'm so glad to have nate back!

and not because it rained almost everyday. rain = a clean slate, lots of snuggles, & fall in a cup [if you haven't tried dosha chai mixed with marshmallow macaron tea, you're missing out!]

but because sometimes you realize that you aren't cut out to be the mom to two teenagers and five dogs while house-sitting for three weeks.

and because sometimes you have to say goodbye to your baby brother. for two years. mexico is getting one amazing guy.

and because sometimes life is hard. sometimes we don't get what we want no matter how hard we try. and sometimes getting out of bed is a major hurdle. and sometimes you resort to writing in your journal more than your blog because things are too painful, personal, and intimate to share with the world.

but as always, things get better. no pressure,

o c t o b e r .